OK, sorry it’s been so long since I’ve posted. This is especially true since I haven’t been working so I should be able to post, right?! What has been taking up all my time, you ask?
Voila! My new son!
His name is Magnus! And he is at least mine and my husband’s personality offspring, because he is crazy. Sometimes he can be a little troublesome/mean, but mostly he makes me laugh and is very sweet. He’s a boxer/lab mix and I’m so glad we rescued him.
So, I have to say that generally, getting paid to do absolutely whatever I want is fabulous. Granted I am job-hunting. And have gotten a call or two. No interviews yet. But otherwise, I’m putting in a terraced, raised vegetable garden and designing other landscaping. I go to Books-a-Million and read and drink coffee. Hold on, brb, its time for an episode of Basilisk.
I sit here at my desk at work, wasting time on Ravelry and knitting blogs, looking up how to create and chart cables and lace, drifting into my own little world. And I’m supposed to be working. I was looking forward to this week at work as I thought it should be smooth sailing but I have such trouble actually doing stuff. I accomplished some yesterday, and of course small breaks can encourage harder and better work overall. But my small breaks are actually big and there is no work overall. Not really. Some days I love the office life, my little cubie, organizing my desk and work, seeing all the red tape paper accomplish its purpose. And other days I wonder why I’m doing this. Does it have a point? And all the trees I’m killing. I appreciate all that I’m learning here as I will most definitely use it later on as my own boss that has to keep track of every little thing and have great office-y skillz, but then these moments of doubt and dread make me wonder if I can keep it up. Can I stick through it when I don’t want to, or when my mind is on flights of fancy and my willpower wants to go along for the ride. I guess this is a confession. I am gifted. I am imaginative, creative, a dreamer. I am like Joseph – whose more practical, down-to-earth brothers decided to ship off to slavery out of hatred. And I love being this way (being a dreamer, not being in slavery). But I can’t stand fences, or boundaries for long. In time management or workload. My boredom just comes from my wanting to move on to something else and being restrained with what is before me now. I want to design at this very moment, and yet I need to go copy, stamp, interoffice mail. Register, and update. And yet, as I type, I think this kind of therapy has helped me. Off to the office world again! Thanks for listening