This has really been on my mind a lot lately, during my time with God especially, but also just in general. I sometimes just feel lost in this respect. What kind of representation of a woman have I been shown? Normally I’m not this open, but I have to talk about this. Growing up I was shown two extremes – extremely overly emotional and manipulative or extremely and overly unemotional. Either all tears and mush or stone hard reality with no compassion. I used to avoid makeup like the plague. I really did not see a reason for it, because deep down I wanted someone, anyone, to love me completely just as I was. No makeup, no mask, just . . . me. I avoided pink and frills (except unicorns). I just tried to exist without any of the outer symbols of being a woman. Not that some people in my life didn’t try to force me into that. I know now how much I missed out on, but up until this year I just didn’t know how to simply be a woman.
What are we really shown, ladies? We see women who show a lot of skin and become sex symbols, and yes there is an aspect to every woman to be sexy. One of my deepest desires is to be the fulfillment of my husband’s desires and to rock my bedroom. But that isn’t all there is to it. There is wearing makeup, and nice clothes, and perfume and feeling that you embody the essence of beauty, and that area I have had to make leaps and bounds on thanks to some awesome friends God has blessed me with. But there is more. There is more to this woman thing. More that God intended when he created woman out of man. I hope to keep on this series as I learn more. Please feel free to comment on if this is also an area of struggle with you. And thanks for listening.